Truth in Fasting

Today is a day of fasting and prayer.  I must admit, although I have seen God work through personal times of prayer and fasting (a dear friend, Emily, came to salvation during a two day fast set aside for prayer for her salvation while in Tokyo this summer), all day I have wondered if this is what I should be doing.  How can this time of extreme exhaustion bring me somehow closer to the throne of God? Yet, I realize that my thoughts today were not at all the intent of God when I sensed Him desiring me to fast on this day.  His intent, as found countless times in scripture, is for His name to be glorified and for me to grasp His all satisfying presence.  While the hunger pains are difficult, it is a reminder that the things of this world, and the sin in my heart are indeed difficult to put out of mind, but God truly satisfies my hunger-- while the rest leaves me wanting.  When I put aside these things in my life and let God satisfy me -- it is there that I hear Him more.  He's no longer just the guy I call on when I am left in hunger and need, He is all I need and meets all my desires.  Through pain and suffering, He often reminds me of this truth.  

Something that has really stuck with me the last couple of weeks is Deuteronomy 8:2-5.  My pastor at the SUMMIT church in Durham, North Carolina, JD Greear, spoke on this particular piece of scripture: 

2 Remember that the LORD your God led you on the entire journey these 40 years in the wilderness, so that He might humble you and test you to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep His commands. 3 He humbled you by letting you go hungry; then He gave you manna to eat which you and your fathers had not known, so that you might learn that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD.  4 Your clothing did not wear out, and your feet did not swell in these 40 years. 5 Keep in mind that the LORD your God has been disciplining you just as a man disciplines his son.  

We do not live on bread alone, we need nothing apart from our Lord because our God is the God who provides us with all that we need.  He provided the Israelites with the manna to eat and now He has given us His son, and through the salvation of our souls and through the conquering of sin and death, Jesus is what fills us.  He is the bread of life (John 6:35). 

Reflect on the cross, the entire weight of it.  Reflect on what Jesus has accomplished for us and know that God is faithful to His promises.  Remember during times of pain and suffering, God is desiring us to draw to Him and to fill us.   

Pursued in Grace

So this is new for me.  In the past 2 years, I absolutely have fallen in love with journaling my thoughts; however, I have never published them or made them accessible to whoever may somehow be interested.  Journaling is good for my soul, good for me to vent my struggles or convictions and later reflect upon them.  It is good for me to physically see on paper what God is stirring in my heart and to later see how those desires seemed to manifest.  How even though I face times of anguish, of fear, of bitterness, of uncertainty, God comes through.  His promises are faithful.  They are just and no matter how horrible the situation might have seemed, He was still holding me gently in His hands.  Those are the same hands that created the earth, that can strike us down at any moment, the hands that brought wrath on His disobedient children of Israel, still hold us, even though we are disobedient, even though we deserve death.  As children of God, He pursues us in His loving grace and mercy.  The book of Hosea is becoming a new favorite of mine.  It is simply amazing!  Israel was on the same level as a prostitute when it came to worshiping God, her people were adulterous in their acts and did not remember their first love because they instead, worshipped other man-made gods.  While God in his justice should destroy Israel, He has a plan because God is also loving.  Chapter 2 verses 14-16 declare God's love for His people:

 14 "Therefore I am now going to allure her; 
       I will lead her into the desert 
       and speak tenderly to her.

 15 There I will give her back her vineyards, 
       and will make the Valley of Achor ^[a] a door of hope. 
       There she will sing ^[b] as in the days of her youth, 
       as in the day she came up out of Egypt.

 16 "In that day," declares the LORD, 
       "you will call me 'my husband';

God has a plan to restore us to Himself.  We are the harlot, filled with sin, yet God looks upon us and desires us to call Him "husband." He desires to purify us and give us acres of hope.